The legendary ball drops at New York City’s Time Square, the Sydney Opera House is all lit up from fireworks as are the Eiffel Tower and many other landmarks around the world, not to mention the countless non-descript ones.
Everyone knows you are the sharpest officer, but be prepared to put “Maj. (Retd.)” before your name once you hang up your uniform for good. Ok, maybe not. Since you stand out so much from the rest, you’ll advance further, to the rank of Lt. Col., tops. Ok? Now go, finish up your staff college and be happy with “PSC” at the end of your name and stop dreaming of adding an NDC (National Defense College) on your business card.
You want to now pack me up and send me to Timbuktu?” yells Dennis Palmer, sitting at the head of the table in the meeting room.
Neither Pink Floyd nor the Pink Panther had anything to do with Bangladesh’s pink wash, but the good thing is that Bangladesh at least didn’t let India play for a good two days during the first test. In fact, the runs of our boys in the first innings were 0,1,8,1,6,0,0,0,4, which together was perhaps a cryptic message to Robi to once again pick up the team sponsorship.
When a cyclone is named Bulbul, chances are people, at least in Bangladesh, won’t take it seriously. And we are Bangladeshis—what freaks us out is not a number 9 signal, but the lowest number
A bit more about “special” rooms from my column a few weeks ago, when Bangladesh University of Engineering and Technology (Buet) was in the news for the wrong reasons. It’s room 429, Nazrul Islam Hall.
Hats off to the Ministry of Public Administration for taking the bold step of introducing paternity leave. Better be clear though about the cap on the number of such leaves, else we will have a population explosion 2.0.
Room 429 is probably the furnace of the boiler. For it is on the topmost floor, thus a few inches of concrete in between the roof above being hit with direct sunlight (remember, the skies were clearer in those days with less pollution) and the furnace underneath.
As Houthi drones strike Aramco oil refineries in Saudi Arabia, the world holds its breath. For the Houthis (reminds me of the nineties band, Hootie and the “Blow” Fish) are backed by Iran which in turn may lead to Operation Desert Stormy Daniels. But if president
We go gambling in a rickshaw, dreaming of returning in a fifty lakh Taka car and end up returning in a one crore taka jalopy of a bus.
Give him a piece of wire, a nut, a bolt and a small sheet of aluminium foil, and MacGyver makes a Mach 2.0 aircraft in the blink of an eye. For us with wide eyes and narrow choices of TV channels (in fact, just one), the man with the blonde mullet (a term I learn many
As our plane makes its final approach in to Chennai Airport, my 7-year-old, who has just recently graduated from flying phobia to the class of thrill seekers, tells me: “Baba, I LOVE rough landings.”
If anyone on board is getting any relief, well, relatively speaking, it is the tallest couple, aka, Mr and Mrs Giraffe, for at least they have their heads sticking out into the ocean breeze (gusty wind really) while the Aedes carry out their (supposedly) lethal,
When it comes to “blue eyed soul” music, Michael Bolton comes to mind. To the point that the joke among young bachelors is that listening to him is a manifestation of getting jilted or being enamoured head over heels.
The gentleman in Lakshmipur orders a watch online. When he receives the package, he discovers two Indian onions. I hope he has held on to them, for now that it is Ramadan, he can sell those two onions for more than the price of the watch he had initially ordered.
The captain boasts of taking advantage of the tail wind, the earth’s rotation and the earth’s curvature, but the fact remains that Los Angeles (LAX) to the airline’s hub city takes no less than 16 hours.
When I check into a hotel, the first thing I do is people watch, and I do so with a smile. I play a game with myself to see if I can guess the reason why this particular person or group of people is at that hotel.
Remember that story where the resident on the ground floor (let's call him "A") would be woken up in the middle of the night every night by two successive "thud" sounds? The tenant upstairs (let's call him "B") would come home late,
Stillwater, Oklahoma. Dad is picking up his son from high school. Mom is videoing the event. Dad rushes to hug the son. The only reason the video goes viral is that dad is in a Speedo swimming trunk (more of a thong), and nothing else.
Despite not being a leap year, 2018 for many in Bangladesh is more than a leap year, consisting of 370 or even more days. With a moratorium on New Year's Eve parties, at least on the ones outdoors and on rooftops (no mention of backyards, since they are practically extinct), most have pushed back the partying by a week, unless they are already in Bangkok.
They do think black and white, well dark and white. The fact that it takes 190 years for the British to eventually leave their Jewel in the Crown just shows how easily the “darker” world can be manipulated.
The photo of the boy from St Joseph's School is flashed during the news on BTV, the only broadcasting channel in the country. His gone missing is national news. Two days later, there is a collective sigh of relief as he re-emerges, unscathed. Domestic interrogations yield that he got a detention at school and fled to his village home to escape the wrath of his parents.
For myself and the senior midshipmen, this is a serious naval exercise. I have my marching orders from the Commandant of the Bangladesh Naval Academy to get serious about a dose of humour for the soon to be commissioned officers.
“Blessings only” is the blessing that has been the best blessing in the blessed season of WMDs—Weddings and Marriages of December. As an engineer I am black and white—at the wedding venue I queue up with all the others who have disregarded the last line of the invitation card.
Times's up!” Everyone stops writing and places his/her test papers on the desk of Professor Ted Birdsall.
The BBC Radio anchor announces live on air: “Well, that was our guest Naveed Mahbub. After the news we have with us in the studio—Jeffrey Archer.”
The thin fused me corrects myself in the nick of time. After all, I have a six-year-old right in front of me. They are blotting papers, more so, when it comes to audio-visual equivalent of the Apple of Eden.
The sophomore (second-year) engineering student sitting in front of my desk is sharp and confident. But being a typical Bangalee, I can't get rid of a parallel train of thought: what's up with his rather unusual circumstances of applying for the position of a summer intern?
President Donald Trump said during his inaugural speech: “From this day forward, it's going to be only America First!”
The busy intersection is busier because people are confused as to what is to be followed (if at all) at the moment—the traffic lights or the hand signals of the police officer on duty.
If there is anything that will not only wake up a drowsy driver, but near about give him a heart attack, is the flashing lights of a police squad car in the US. The wattage and luminance emitted puts Dhaka's lit up Golf Garden to shame.
With the sun over the equator, it is hot as hell. July 19 records a high of 39 degrees Celsius, thus almost touching Bangladesh's record lowest 43…runs against West Indies.
My own vicarious hat trick—third in a row and the last column on the World Cup. Not surprising, as, for the past one month, not much work has been done in Bangladesh except for posting Facebook statuses on the games.
Well, the World Cup continues. The South Koreans are back home but are greeted with raw eggs. Thank Heavens, it's not North Korea; instead of eggs, it would've been ballistic missiles.
Perhaps it is no coincidence that World Cup Football is not on a leap year. For this is the time when our hearts, especially those in Bangladesh, leap not only a beat, but beat in beats to see the favourites beat the favourites of the opponents. Even on December 16, do we not see so many flags as we see during this time—not those of Bangladesh's.
I select seats 61A and 61B aboard the Boeing 777-200ER for myself and my only other travel companion, my 13-year-old. These are the poor man's business class seats—two seats next to the window and the aisle in the otherwise 3-3-3 seating configuration as the aircraft tapers off at the back. Besides, in the reverse direction, these are the 3rd row seats which will allow me to almost pre-board with the business class passengers.
As I sit down to write When Eddie Met Wallie, last week's Humorously Yours, I make a Freudian Slip in writing “pure bread” instead of “pure bred”.
During the serene start of a cricket game, two captains are on the field along with officials, as the coin is tossed.
The students, teachers and staff of Marjory Stoneman Douglas High School return to campus in Parkland, Florida. But things will never be the same. After Marjory, just like after Columbine, Virginia Tech, Santana, San Bernardino, Las Vegas…, the debate on gun control is rekindled and is surely about to die an early death (yes, a sad pun), thanks to the gun-toting lobby.
Despite the apparent cordiality, there is the undercurrent of a race for the shotgun position, that is the front passenger seat of the car. Ok, the term “shotgun position” comes from the person sitting next to the stage coach driver sitting on the top of the stage coach with a shotgun in his hands as a means of protecting the passengers in the stage coach in the Wild Wild West.
Examination hall, University of Michigan, Ann Arbor. They laugh when I say "examination hall".
Watching movies at home, no more missing the crucial scene as I have to dart to the bathroom, no rushing to catch the start of the
Sure I lived in sunny Southern California, but life is not quite Sunset Boulevard or Rodeo Drive or Malibu Beach.
But when you DO get that time, you'll be able to explain how the bird escaped from the cage not only in just two sentences, but with both your hands in your pockets…
In America, they put soap in the mouth of a kid when he uses swear words. The cussing has happened, he is a kid and the soap is out. But here's the catch: His daily dose of medicines include Propecia that
AFTER meeting the full cast of My Little Pony movie at Comic Con 2017 in San Diego, California along with getting their autographs, it is only natural that my six-year-old daughter goes to see the movie.
Forget the 2,000 years, focus on the rightmost two digits. The world has turned 18, woo hoo! Therefore, not a surprise that 17 has been anything but boring.
Like every child, I'm a fussy eater. So, when I finally finish eating after what seems an eternity, mom goes, “Everybody clap! Naveed has
I land at New York's John F Kenney Airport. Soon after, I am greeted by the sound of typical New York, or should I say, JFK Airport—an irritated, middle aged lady barking orders for people to line up as per their visa/immigration/nationality status.
One fine morning, someone from the Embassy of Bangladesh in Washington DC decides to have a few plastic cones on the street in the front with 'No Parking' written on them. No wait, let's make it a bit more benign – 'No Standing'.
Definitely many long nights of depression with the end of the long running Sultan Suleiman—one of the most popular shows on local TV. In fact, I had to make sure my weekly TV show, The Naveed Mahbub Show on ATN Bangla ...
Being late in Dhaka due to traffic jam is the lamest of all excuses. For if there is anything predictable in Dhaka, it is the gnarling traffic jam. To make it on time for an appointment across town, all one has to do is start two days early.
While the world and even many in Bangladesh are going paperless, some are adamant about killing trees and sending snail mail by courier, which has a 50 percent rate of successful delivery.
The sky has fallen for the Tigers after South Africa. Add insult to injury, there is ensuing politics, I mean real street political politics—just to divert our attention from the whitewash in South Africa, Taskin Ahmed gets married.
UST like when Usain Bolt and his cohorts dart off at the sound of the pistol, there are at least 10 anxious fellow countrymen of mine making a beeline for the front door at no less an impressive 0 to 60, their sprint triggered by the landing gear of the aircraft making contact with Runway 14 of Hazrat Shahjalal International Airport.
OCTOBER 11 is World Obesity Day. October 13 is World Egg Day. October 14 is Global Hand Washing Day (makes sense, gotta wash the hands after handling eggs—there's salmonella). October 16 is World Food Day. At this rate, I would expect October 17 to be World Diarrhea Day…
