A time for new love and old romance
FEBRUARY has, since the Middle Ages, been the season for a celebration of love. Pope Gelasius declared February 14 as St.Valentine's Day around 498 A.D. It was commonly believed in France and England that February 14 was the beginning of the birds' mating season and so should be a day for romance.
It became common for friends and lovers across social classes to exchange small tokens of affection or hand written notes. Printed cards began to replace these letters because direct expressions of one's feelings were discouraged then, as they are even now.
Even though the history of Valentine's Day is unclear, it has become one of the most popular holidays among lovers and florists. The common symbols relating to the day are cupids, hearts, roses, teddy bears and words of adoration. Children exchange Valentine cards decorated with current comic and cartoon icons. Adults have continued this tradition of card giving, which makes this day, after Christmas, the second largest card-sending holiday of the year.
Bishop Valentine, an advocate of young, ostracised soldiers who were not permitted to marry or see their sweethearts, was sentenced to death for trying to convert Claudius to Christianity. While awaiting his fate he came in contact with his jailor's blind daughter, whose eyesight he restored through his faith. Just before his execution he asked for a pen and paper from his jailor and signed a farewell message to her. "From your Valentine," it said, a phrase that has endured ever since. Valentine's Day spread with Christianity, but is now celebrated all over the world.
We all wish to be desired, to be loved and accepted. But, nowadays, after achieving the very love that was craved for, we note that it vanishes at any opportunity available, and the heart is given anew to a new lover. Lovers should treasure the vows given to each other and try to abide by them, or else love itself will become a farce.
In the course of the research on Valentine's Day, I came across an extract where it was mentioned that "God has met this need through the most loving act ever done in the history of the world. God loved us so much that He sent Isa/Jesus (pbuh) to earth to live as a man. We are separated from God due to our sins, so He provided a way for us to spend eternity with Him in Heaven. In a great act of love, Jesus (pbuh) died on the cross as a substitute for each of us. But he will rise again to guide our lives and love us as we have been never loved before."
In this context, I would like to express my own views on the fact that when everyone will be intoning "Ya nafsi, ya nafsi" on the Day of Judgement , Hazrat Mohammad Mustafa (pbuh) will be praying "Ya ummat, ya ummat" to take us along with him to heaven. Can anyone provide a better example of unmatched love?
I ask the new generation: Have you ever thought of setting a new trend in wishing your valentine? Why not express your feelings by crooning lines like "kya janu sanam, hoti hai kya ghum ki shaam, jal uthe saw diye jub liya tera naam." Don't you think "I love you" has become an old fashioned and stereotyped expression of your feelings? It has been used for ages and will perhaps continue till the end of time.
If you can change your style in clothes and hairdo, even if for a short period, then why not try this? Indeed, why not reflect on those memorable lines from Manna De -- "jodi kagoje likho naam kagoj chhirhe jaabe/pathore likho naam pathor khoye jaabe/hridoye likho naam she naam roye jaabe?"
Have you ever noticed how romantic people were about two decades back? Their mode of expression was so refined and elegant. Romance was more ethereal than physical. When a lover tells his beloved "Kara jeno bhalo beshe aalo, jelo chhilo, shurjer aalo tai nibhe giye chhilo," the intensity of this love cannot be defined. It has to be felt deep inside!
Valentine's Day provides us with an opportunity to revive our old love for each other. Our husbands who, perhaps, have almost taken us for granted suddenly remember our craze for flowers and ice cream, and sometimes they even get carried away and take us out to dine! Thanks to St. Valentine.
Wives, on the other hand, feel how hard men work to provide them with all the pleasures of living in this beautiful world, so they try to get hold of the best card, sometimes a gift too, to express how much they still love their life-mates who are their only ray of happiness and care in old age when the children are busy fending for themselves.
It is a cool sight to watch old grandparents, who are lucky to be still alive and kicking, buying flowers for each other. They are seen going for evening walks on the occasion, and eating "phuchkas." This everlasting love is our desire when divorce has become the fashion of the day, and sacrifice of feelings is a phrase thrown out of the dictionary of our children.
In their attempt to be trendy, children these days have taken relationships very lightly. Whatever happened to all the vows and cards, which expressed their endless love for each other?
I would earnestly request our young generation to practise what they preach. If they have made promises to love and cherish their mates in grief and happiness, they must fulfill their vows. If you are bored with saying "I love you," I would suggest you go back a few years and woo your love with the immortal lines -- "Aami etoje tomay bhalo bheshechhi, tobu mone hoy e jeno go kichhu noi, keno aaro bhalo beshe jete pare na hridoy" or "Bondhu tomar pother shathike chine niyo, hashi aar gane shod kore diyo joto reen."
At the end, I pray to Almighty Allah -- "Please preserve true love in this world, love that binds souls together, families together and nations together." This is my earnest and unfeigned prayer to Allah, and to our very young generation who are the only ray of hope and who can mould this troubled world into a beautiful haven for all of us to live in. Happy Valentine's Day!
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