Love's unconditional labour
There is tremendous turmoil in the world today -- turmoil created by human follies and unfettered ambition. The news is replete with hopeless stories about the European debt crisis, gloomy prospects for job seekers, scary banking losses and acute volatility of the stock market. In parallel, the uncertainty in the Middle East has cast an ominous shadow over the future of the rosy Arab Spring. We have a subterranean restlessness brewing in the planet, which could erupt, any time, into a man-made earthquake!
Fortunately, nature has its way of balancing calamities: the weather has been exceptionally kind to us in the United States this fall. Except for a freak snowfall in late October, we have been experiencing an Indian summer, characterised by cool and crisp days, ideal for lazy, reflective walks.
Thankfully, I have the time and inclination to indulge in these simple pleasures of life. Some may consider such idle activities as displaying a lack of sensitivity to the woes of the world. But I have decided that, since there is very little I can do to solve the larger problems, I might as well partake of the smaller delights, like taking a therapeutic walk. Which is what I did earlier in the day!
As I passed by the Elementary School, I noticed boys and girls in spectacular costumes playing in the grounds. I suddenly realised that it was October 31st -- the much-awaited celebration of Halloween. According to some historians, Halloween originated with the ancient Celtic festival of Samhain for honouring the dead, when people lit bonfires and wore costumes to ward off roaming ghosts. Over time, Halloween has evolved into a community-based, secular event characterised by child-friendly activities such as dressing up in eclectic costumes, trick-or-treating, carving jack-o-lanterns and playing pranks.
As I watched the assorted group of little monsters, elves, fairies and story-book characters romping and laughing in the school playground, a strange question lodged in my head: was this fun-event spontaneous or the fruit of strenuous parental effort? I could sense hours of hard work and thought invested by parents in the planning and creation of the Halloween celebrations.
In my sub-conscious I was transported to my mothering days when my kids would come home from school and regally announce: "I need a Halloween costume, something original and scary!" Being an immigrant mom juggling between several culture shocks, I found Halloween costumes to be one of my most dreaded annual challenges! Looking back, I am ashamed to admit that I performed miserably and my kids rarely graduated from store-manufactured pink fairies and green goblins!
Today, I paused in front of the school to absorb the sounds and images of Halloween with detached engagement. I paid a silent tribute to the efforts of the efficient moms walking in with their pumpkin pies and decorated cookies. Some of them were in costumes themselves, geared up for the School Halloween Party. To a great extent, I could empathise with them and feel the pain and pleasure of child rearing, despite the ongoing trials and tribulations of daily life, especially in an uncertain world.
Yes, even though the world economy is crashing, jobs are being lost and life has become increasingly taxing, the toils of parenting continue unabated. The onerous responsibility of tending to one's kids never seems like drudgery -- it is, after all, love's labour. Tireless days and nights of caring, nursing and bonding are spent to ensure that children attain happiness, or at least stability in life. Then, when it's time to let go, it's done with a sense of resignation that, at least, one has done one's best.
There may come a time when parents feel helpless and are forced to take a back seat while watching their kids speed toward a precipice. Yet, they continue to offer their children the "safety net" of an assured home and unconditional love. When times get tough parents seek comfort in the tender memories of past sharing -- be it with home-made Christmas cookies, Thanksgiving turkey or Eid biryani. The expressions may be culturally diverse, but the feelings are universal!
As a parent, all you can do is create happy moments for your children because you cannot ensure a happy life for them … "You may give them your love but not your thoughts…. You may house their bodies but not their souls, For their souls dwell in the house of tomorrow..."
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