12 strange car licence plates
A guy who lives near me (actually, he lives in the adjoining, much swankier neighbourhood) drives a low-slung, super-sleek, jet-black sports car. His car "number" plate is just a single word: "WOLF."
I was standing at the bus stop the other day when WOLF growled past. The two women next to me saw the license plate and laughed.
Now I'm quite sure this was not the reaction he paid so much money to achieve. "Why is it funny?" I asked. "It's so male," said one. "It's so stupid," said the other. "Is that tautology?" I asked.
Countries around the world are flocking to earn tax dollars by selling vanity plates to car owners. Where I live, people are racing to get them. At the time of writing this, a guy in a black Mercedes bearing the word "versace" on its license plate has just zoomed past.
That night, I asked women at the bar why guys buy vanity plates to impress females, but women sneer at them. "A guy thinks that we see his number plate saying 'cool dude' and we think he is a cool dude," said one gal. "But in fact what we think is, there goes a guy with more money than sense: I'm glad I'm not dating him."
A second female interrupted. "Not true! I like guys with more money than sense. They're my favourites. I collect them." A third woman, with a bitter curl of her lip, said: "All men have more money than sense." After a thoughtful pause, she added: "Even the ones with no money."
In defence of motorists in Asia, male and female, I pointed out that one does occasionally see intelligent number plates in this region. Indonesian violinist Idri Sardi has B10LA on his car, which looks like "biola," the Bahasa Indonesian word for violin. Jakarta actress Leoni has a plate on which is written: L30NI.
But I'll admit these aren't as witty as those you see in the west. Like the divorced US woman with the sports car carrying a plate saying: "washis".
Or the one owned by a self-deprecating blond that says blond, spelt correctly, but attached upside down.
Or the Porsche labeled IXLR8 ("I accelerate"). Here are some more classics, mostly from the US, home of the odd license plate:
Also, there's a language issue. Bangladeshi plates are in Bengali, Burmese ones are in Burmese, Chinese and Sri Lankan ones usually have one character from the vernacular language, and Pakistan has plates in Urdu, Farsi and Hindi. Creating wit is not easy.
But this doesn't mean that Asian motorists can't do it. Consider the infamous events of the summer of 2002 in Beijing. A new law allowed citizens to design their own license plates.
A motorist was soon spotted driving in USA-911, which was considered insensitive.
People started registering famous names such as IBM-001.
Then someone registered "250" which is an insult in Chinese. Money was historically kept in batches of 500 units, so if you say, "you're a 250," it means "you're only half there." Officials quickly changed the laws and wit vanished once more from China's capital.
Meanwhile, if the owner of WOLF is reading this, don't pick up the girls at the 58A bus stop. They're not impressed.
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