Forging future leaders: The power of self-regulation and self-discipline

We live in a VUCA – Volatile, Uncertain, Complex, and Ambiguous – world right now, that is getting increasingly convoluted. With rapid technological shifts, looming environmental crises, and complex geopolitical tensions, it's clear that we need something more from our leaders. We need empathetic, resilient, and truly capable individuals.

Leadership today isn't just about knowledge or technical skills; it's about having profound control over one's own emotions, thoughts, and actions, what we call self-regulation. When this crucial ability is paired with resolute ways of living and working—or self-discipline—you get the very foundation of effective leadership.

If we want leaders like this, we must start by rethinking how we raise our children, right from their classrooms to our own homes.

When we talk about discipline in schools, our minds often jump to strict rules and punishments for breaking them. But discipline, and especially self-discipline, is much more than that. At its heart, it's about empowerment.

Self-discipline gives individuals the inner compass to lead a meaningful, structured life based on their own values, not just external demands. It's how constructive habits are forged.

Think about children who consistently approach their studies, sports, or art with a systematic method. These approaches eventually become second nature. Tasks that initially felt like a real effort soon become automatic, setting them up for long-term well-being and productivity.

Every single time a child practices a self-disciplined action, their brain actually strengthens the neural pathways that make that behaviour easier. For instance, a student might initially struggle to focus while studying. But with consistent practice, that concentration can come naturally. Students won't have to consciously force themselves to concentrate anymore, whether they're at their desk or simply trying to focus.

Psychologist Angela Duckworth explores this brilliantly in her book Grit: The Power of Passion and Perseverance. Her research powerfully demonstrates that disciplined persistence is a far greater predictor of success than innate talent or intelligence.

Hence, through consistent practice, a disciplined approach to life, and strong self-regulation, a student can not only excel academically but also achieve lifelong success in areas like social relationships, career development, and leadership.

Ultimately, mastering self-regulation is absolutely essential for effective leadership. A self-disciplined and self-regulated person knows how to keep pushing forward, even when faced with significant obstacles and distractions. Children who master self-regulation learn to deal with setbacks productively, seeing them as valuable chances for learning and growth.

In a world where we're constantly bombarded by media and our attention spans are shrinking – a world where it's increasingly tough to stand out – this attribute is becoming invaluable for future leaders.

Self-regulation also helps children understand where their emotions come from. This allows them to respond to social situations thoughtfully, rather than reacting impulsively. These children grow into emotionally intelligent adults. This emotional intelligence, in turn, helps them build stronger working relationships with diverse teams, which is a vital skill in modern leadership.

The ability to manage stress, keep things in perspective, and take care of one's emotional needs directly impacts mental well-being. Leaders who prioritise their mental health make more balanced decisions and inspire others to adopt healthy behaviours, creating a positive ripple effect throughout their organisation.

It might seem counterintuitive, but genuine self-discipline and self-regulation actually thrive in environments that champion true autonomy. If we empower children to feel ownership over their own lives and decisions, they develop an inner motivation that's far more powerful than compliance driven by external rules, regulations, rewards, or punishments. By connecting self-discipline with self-empowerment, this autonomy-based approach sets a higher expectation for them, significantly boosting their self-esteem and self-efficacy. It's well-established that individuals who feel they have control over their lives show greater commitment, creativity, and persistence.

To nurture self-regulation in future leaders, schools and families must work hand-in-hand. Schools need to create environments with clear, consistent expectations – environments that prioritise values and ethics over mere compliance. Parents and teachers can establish predictable routines, giving children a crucial sense of security. And remember, everyday activities take around 66 days on average to become a habit. During this critical phase, they can offer unwavering support through encouragement, gentle reminders, and recognition.

Furthermore, to cultivate resilience in children, we need to encourage them to respond to their own mistakes with compassion, not harsh self-criticism. At the same time, we must emphasise the importance of effort and the opportunity to learn from every experience. Crucially, children learn far more from observing the social environment, particularly adult behaviour, than from direct instructions. So, parents and teachers must consistently practice self-regulated and self-disciplined behaviours, serving as genuine role models.

If adults are inconsistent or avoid difficult tasks, children will pick up on that. But if adults handle stress well, maintain focus on their priorities, and respond appropriately to setbacks, they become powerful, absorbed examples. By creating an environment where self-regulation and self-discipline are truly supported, we can set our children on a path to happy and successful lives.

Looking ahead, as teachers and parents, our most vital responsibility is to prepare the next generation not just to survive in this world, but to truly thrive as future leaders. By prioritising self-regulation and self-discipline, we must nurture children in an environment that helps them develop the ability to navigate their own lives with purpose and intention. That way, we prepare them not only for success in school but for lives of deep meaning, fulfilment, and contribution.

Dr Amlan K Saha is the Principal of Glenrich International School, Uttara.