Too Many Cooks

ILLUSTRATION: YAFIZ SIDDIQUI

Here is a piece of lifesaving advice for this Ramadan - if you are fasting (this year it is going to be around 15 hours of fasting in Bangladesh), maybe you should avoid surfing TV channels from noon to right before Iftar.

This is when all our TV channels turn into a food galore, with chefs and amateur cooks vying for your hungry attention. While some of them make you wonder what qualifies people to come up with a TV show with such simplistic dishes – some of them, with their fancy, well-plated dishes, will leave you very hungry. And you don't want to feel any hungrier right before Iftar!

Just how the combination of Roohafza-chana-peyaju-jilapi are an inseparable part of Bangladeshi Ramadan, in the last few years, cooking shows have become a trend; yet another addition to our Ramadan lifestyle.

There are many types of cooking shows, but I love the ones that are sponsored by the big brands. It is fascinating to see how these 'chefs' reproduce the same peyajus that we have been eating for generations, exactly the same way! (The name of the brand is ceremoniously placed in front of the recipe of the day.) Even though, one uses the same ingredients for the mundane peyaju at home – what turns this must-have Iftar appetiser into a 'special' hors d'oeuvre is the sponsored product that is sprinkled into the batter.

Another interesting feature of these shows is participation of 'guests', where each show features visiting chefs who demonstrate how to cook a dish of their choice.

To be a guest on a cooking show: (a) you need to be a celebrity; (b) you need to know how to cook at least one dish.

The first qualification is mandatory, while the second one is not and could be considered an added bonus. Even if you don't know how to cook, you will be handed a recipe of something as simple as making lemonade or an omelette by the chef, according to reliable sources.

Last year, I came across a cooking show, where the chef-cum-host invited a popular young singer as a guest cook. After an elaborate introduction, she asked him, “So, what are you going to cook for us today?”  The guest answered with a two minute long lecture on why our body's circulatory system needs more fluid during Ramadan. After all the gibberish, he finally revealed his dish: some old fashioned Scandinavian strawberry milkshake, which surprisingly is infused with actual strawberries!

He took a juicer, and poured the ingredients into it - milk, spoonfuls of sponsored sugar, one pint of sponsored ice cream, some crushed ice, mixed with a few strawberries. He then poured the mixture in a glass, before venturing into another lecture on why it is vital to serve the drink cold with crushed ice, and why plating (here it means pouring the shake in a champagne glass and topping it with some crushed crackers) is of utmost importance. I didn't understand where Scandinavia came into the picture while preparing this drink. The celebrity guest also cleverly ignored explaining what exactly gives this drink an international status.

I was baffled as to how a simple glass of milkshake with a fancy name was able to bring such appreciation and scientific analyses, that too on a national TV channel.

Then there is another show, where the guest does not have much to do. On this one-(wo)man show, the over enthusiastic chef-cum-host cooks her recipes, as well as her participating guest's recipes. She is actually more engrossed in chatting, rather than cooking. She talks continuously about the ingredients, the flavours, about the differences between celebrating Ramadan in Bangladesh and the Middle East -- everything done in incoherent pieces, pattern-less, if not annoying, writing of the show. She speaks to the guest, interrupts when the guest tries to reply and ends up answering her question herself -- indeed an entertaining show for the fasting lot!

I know people, who don't cook, and have no interest in becoming a chef in 30 days, who watch these shows just like a sport spectator. Some say that the mouth-watering viewing experience strengthens their self-restraint. I know someone who watches one particular show just for the chef and her makeup and the sarees that she wears in every episode.

Check these shows for yourself and discover the food adventures every channel competes to present in front of you. It seems like we want to eat everything we can in this one month of spirituality, while these shows entice people into a practice of presenting an exhaustive range of delicious (yet healthy, as they claim) recipes for Iftar throughout the month. They promise to bring you a number of delectable dishes that will add variety, and nutrition to every meal during this holy month of Ramadan. Let's just forget about exercising self-control.

Because during this one month, we turn into the biggest foodies. It is not our fault, blame it on the media!