Bookshelf sales soar as citizens look to get instant personalities on zoom
"My boss gave me a disapproving glare during a Zoom meeting. Turns out he was unimpressed by my background which was a newly-finished wall in eggshell white granite tiles from Italy. My friends thought it was super cool as a neutral, earthy, calming background for online video meetings. Boss felt I was being paid too much," Shame-Im-Hasan, 40+/-, woefully said his work woes.
"So I changed it to a wall that had damp and mold on it for the poverty look. Boss was still upset until I changed my background by installing the latest fad: a bookshelf. Everybody now listened to what I had to say. I was suddenly important," he recalled.
The Zoom background has become a growing issue during the pandemic where everyone has to attend online meetings with nothing but their expressions and bland personalities on display. The blank walls behind them put the participants in stark contrast.
"I feel like I have to perform and be more expressive. That's too much pressure," says Krysten Stewart, actress from the hit movie about sentient blood-thirsty sparkly glitters.
Shame-Im, meanwhile, has now been promoted because he appears so well read. "I had to buy books but it is a small price to pay. Well, it was actually a big price to pay. Damn bookshelf needed 307 books to fill."
Bookshelf sales have gone up by 47 percent in the capital city of Dhaka. Mohila Kabir, CEO of EasyPeasy, pivoted her business from growing peas easily using cheap labour to making and delivering bookshelves all across Bangladesh.
She said, "In 2019, it was important to dress properly and have the right whiff of Eau Sauvage by Christian Dior. 2020 is all about the right video call backgrounds and none of that fake digital mess. Do it right with our bookshelves."
One Satireday staffer was fired for putting up a background of Putin riding a bear. His firing saved the publication many monies but now we also need an editor because he was the editor.
Some enterprising digital geniuses have come up with an alternative.
Lolita Karim, singer/songwriter/restaurateur/obituary designer, has said she printed out a bookshelf and pasted it on the wall behind her, making her look impressively intellectual. Now men are even more afraid to talk to her. All this for only taka 600.
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