How do you get your students to be more active when it comes to university? Usually, what you see in a university student is a deluded soul who has probably lost all purpose in life. Similarly, what do you do when you want to make people participate in something they are not that interested in? You arrange a giveaway contest, of course. However, unlike the usual candles-in-jars or makeup pages, university giveaways will be slightly different.
Getting your desired courses for the coming semester can be a gruesome task. It may not have taken the stage of bloodshed yet, but the way things unravel at these sessions, it might not be long before we get to see that side of university advising. But what if we were to tell you that this hassle can be avoided? What if you had the opportunity to select your courses, along with your preferred section, without having to participate in The Hunger Games?
As unbelievable as it may sound, we are giving you the chance to do the impossible. This advising season, we are giving away three passes to three undergraduate students for an “all exclusive” advising session. These sessions will allow you to be the first ones to choose your courses for the coming semester with your desired sections and class timings.
To take part in this giveaway, you need to have a CGPA of less than 3.00 with a minimum of one F grade. Take a picture of your grade sheet and post it on your Facebook, Instagram and LinkedIn and then tag us in those posts using #GradesDoNotMatter. Afterwards, tag 10 of your friends who you think will end up becoming dropouts. Three lucky winners will be selected at random and will be given the opportunity of a lifetime.
Are you fed up with missing out on precious marks due to low attendance? Do you believe that such a system should not exist where attendance is mandatory? May be we can help you out in that case.
Of course, we cannot change the system but we can cheat it. In our second giveaway package, we bring to you the attendance cheat. Three lucky winners will be selected at random and they will be awarded with our gold, silver or bronze cheat. With the gold cheat, attendance for all your courses will no longer be mandatory for the next semester. The silver cheat will allow your friends to give the attendance on your behalf, something we refer to as “proxy”. The bronze cheat holder can visit his or her respective faculty member at any time of the semester with the cheat to redeem attendance marks without having to attend a single class.
To participate in this giveaway, all you need to do is allow us, your university authorities, to send your past attendance records to your parents, and then live stream their reaction on Facebook using #Never2Late4Class.
Every year, a huge number of new students enroll at the university, hogging up that one square meter of campus area which could have been yours. Don’t you feel abandoned or restless when you realise that the next day you go to your campus, you might not get a tile to stand on?
Worry not, for we have heard your silent plea. As the university authority, it is our sole responsibility to make sure that our resources are sufficient to satisfy the need of our beloved students. Now, instead of decreasing the number of freshers we take in every semester or increasing the quantity of existing resources (because those things would be so absurd, right?), we will give you the opportunity to have your own private space on campus. That’s right, we’re giving away space at our campus to three lucky participants.
First position holder will have a personal chair bearer who will carry around a special Chairefell plastic chair for them every time they enter the campus, for the entire semester. Second position holder will be provided with a 3x3 square feet area in the campus which will be their personal property. They can even rename the space if they want to. Third position holder will always get priority while using the university elevator.
To participate in this giveaway, all you need to do is stop complaining about how poorly your university deals with such issues, and share the thought with your friends on Facebook using #MyUniNumberUno.
So what are you waiting for? Do not miss out on these glorious opportunities. Participate and tell your friends to do the same. Also, don’t forget to like, share and subscribe.
Faisal wants to be the very best, like no one ever was. To survive university is his real test, to graduate is his cause. Send him memes and motivation at firstname.lastname@example.org