A day in the life of a cell phone battery | The Daily Star
12:00 AM, December 20, 2018 / LAST MODIFIED: 12:06 AM, December 20, 2018

A day in the life of a cell phone battery


What…? Ow, it's morning already? It's almost 6 am. Robin's alarm is gonna go off any minute now. So, it's a Tuesday. Let me just check her plans for today. She has classes from 9 to 1. Then lunch, followed by a visit to her friend's place and then finally home for a family gathering. Doesn't seem like a busy day. Hope she doesn't go overboard with me like always. And there goes the alarm. Time to wake up Robin. Robin? Hello?


The alarm has been going on for over 20 minutes now. What kind of a sleep is this? Wake up girl! You're going to be late as always. Or at least snooze the alarm, I am not even plugged in. Robin? Robin!


It took this girl 35 minutes and 5 percent of my life to wake up. Yes you're late, now hurry up. Oh sure, call a ride from one of your hundred apps. I mean going out to the street and asking, “Mama jaben?” doesn't work anymore right? Wi-Fi off, GPS and mobile data on. And with that, time for me to turn hot. This day can't possibly get any worse right?


Psst! You're at class. You might wanna turn your data off. I am down to 80 percent and… what's with the vibration? Oh, there it is again. It's continuously vibrating. Make it stop. Robin! Oh you're texting. During class. No wonder your grades are so poor.


It's physics class now. Stop looking at cat videos on Instagram! For the sake of processing power, turn off the mobile data. And while you're at it, could you also lower down the brightness a little? How blind are you exactly you little piece of...


Um, your food is getting cold. Stop taking pictures of the food. Oh my God, you're using flash?  It's 2018, nobody uses flash anymore while taking pictures. No wonder you're not friends with the popular kids. You'll always manage to drain the life out of me, won't you?


Please tell me you have my charger with you. Or perhaps one of those power banks that you all carry around these days. I might need some juice you know, down to 40 percent here.


Go ahead. Call a ride. I am not complaining. After all, why would you care if I am dead right? Oh listen to Bryan Adams while you're at it, why not.


*Power saving mode on* You must be proud of yourself right?


Robin! Robin, please! Put it in me. I beg of you. I am in need of life support. Connect me to a power source, please. What if your parents call and can't reach you? Won't they panic?


“Death is but the next great adve...”


Faisal wants to be the very best, like no one ever was. To survive university is his real test, to graduate is his cause. Send him memes and motivation at abir.afc@gmail.com

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