This Week's Horrorscope

ARIES

Laser technology has progressed far enough for us to be scared.



TAURUS

Old habits Die Hard 5.



GEMINI

Oh, no! We broke the planet!



CANCER

Klopp wants you to run, and you need to run away.



LEO

All that shines is not gold, but it probably is another expensive metal. Take it!



VIRGO

Tom Hardy needs a hug, and he has asked for you.



LIBRA

Memes are the art form of our times.



SCORPIO

You should have seen the look on your face, it was bad.



SAGITTARIUS

Treasure these moments for the future does not have these moments.



CAPRICORN

Ill fated is the journey that ends/starts at Uttara. 



AQUARIUS

The biggest roadblock to your success is everything you stand for.



PISCES

Stop what you are doing, because you are going on a trip and no one else is invited.