Menopausal moms
Dear Maya Apa,
Please can you help me with my mother? My mother is 51 years old. For the past few months, she has been very emotional and unpredictable. One moment, she will be happy and the next she will be upset for no reason. We have a happy family life and no recent events have occurred for her to be sad. I took her to the doctor and he said that she has menopause for which he gave her medicine for but is there anything I can do to help her through this time?
Dear Reader,
Thank you for your question. Menopause, is indeed a very significant time in a woman's life and it is important to understand it. Menopause is a natural ageing process that occurs in all women. This is when the female hormone, oestrogen, decreases and so women stop having periods and can no longer become pregnant. This usually occurs between the ages of 45 to 55 years. The emotional mood swings that your mother is experiencing is part of a whole spectrum of menopausal symptoms. These can last for months before menopause and can continue for some time afterwards. Here are a list of some other symptoms she may be experiencing:
Hot Flushes
Night sweats
Vaginal dryness
Disturbed sleep
Problems concentrating
Anxiety and low mood
This can be a very overwhelming time for your mother and so it is important that you help through this period.
We are all suffering from the scorching heat at the moment but for those, like your mother, going through hot flushes due to menopause, this can be unbearable. You can help by keeping her environment cool by having air conditioning or sufficient fans in her house. Always ensure she has bottles of cool water at hand that she can drink to cool herself down. She may also be suffering from night sweats. To tolerate this, she should wear light, loose dresses that are not restricting.
A bedside fan will be of great use to her. Many women feel that they cannot sleep at night during this time. It is advisable to encourage her to be involved in some light exercise during the day like yoga or meditation. Activities like these relax the mind as well as body so sleep is more forthcoming. A glass of milk at night is also known to aide in sleeping.
The more difficult sides to manage are the emotional symptoms of menopause. As you have described, your mother's moods may be unpredictable. Do not worry, this is very common amongst women and this, like all the other symptoms, will subside. The most important things you can do for her is to be patient, considerate and give her the space to go through her emotions. This is just a natural process she is going through. Spend time with her and allow her to speak about what she is feeling if she wants to. Many women keep a diary at this time, to express their emotions.
Think of activities she may enjoy doing like painting, reading or watching a film that will encourage her to focus on a specific activity. This is the perfect opportunity to start a new hobby that you can both do. Enhancing your bond and spending good quality time together will encourage emotional stability.
After trying all of these things, if you are still concerned about your mother, you can consult with a physician regarding Hormone Replacement Therapy (HRT) which can help to alleviate symptoms.
I hope we have helped. Please contact Maya Apa again.
Always by your side,
Maya Apa
Photo: Collected
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