Stop Romanticising the Sacrifices of Motherhood
Motherhood generally comes with a lot of love, solicitude, and a great deal of sacrifice. There are very few things that come with such selfless and pure intent like that of a mother’s benevolent sacrifices for her children. From the basics of feeding and raising their children to the death of plenty of careers of these nurturing women, the limits are boundless. There really is no way around admiring and applauding these brave women for all that they do for us.
However, there seem to be some extremely unrealistic expectations set by the extreme glorification of a mother's sacrifices all over the world. Although all of their unparalleled contributions are more than commendable, it is also important to allow them to make choices for themselves from time to time, if not always.
The primary issue with overly romanticising these sacrifices is that it sets superlative and unreasonable standards that are almost impossible to meet all the time. This in turn ostracises many mothers who find themselves feeling insecure for not being able to score the "perfect parent" tag. Subsequently, this makes it all the more difficult for moms to ask for help. Furthermore, it convinces numerous women that they must surrender all of their personal ambitions, wants and goals because if they don't, they are selfish.
The internalised prejudice within society expects mothers to have it all together and to enjoy every minute of this rewarding yet exhausting process from the moment their child is born till they grow up completely. This pushes mental health issues such as postpartum depression and anxiety under the bed and makes it rather difficult for these women to adjust with the new changes they are suddenly required to make.
Such idealisation also lets countless fathers off the hook since the societal expectations from them often start and end with providing for the family. How many people really care as much if a father has cooked, cleaned or attended his children's parent-teacher meetings? Even if they have, chances are that they are far more applauded for the same actions than any of our mothers ever have been. They are met with more appreciation simply because when father's take such responsibilities, they are doing things that are not already expected of them. The question is, why not?
It is crucial to maintain transparency for the sake of our heroic mothers to let them know that it is alright to feel frustrated, exhausted and everything in between. Motherhood is not all peaches and cream and it should be okay to acknowledge that. Do not forget to praise your mothers for all their blood, sweat and tears and also remember to tell them that it is okay to make mistakes. Let them know that it is alright for them to put themselves first, take a day off every now and then, and most importantly remind them that all that they do for us is enough.
Anusha usually has a lot on her plate. Send her memes and motivation at anusha.mourshed11@gmail.com