What goes on in a family WhatsApp group
It started one Saturday morning when my weekend slumber was rudely interrupted by a buzzing of my WhatsApp. I opened the phone to find myself added to a new group entitled'We R Family' and six messages asking me to wake up, followed by 16 threads about the chores that were to be done by me before my mother got home. In that moment I knew, there was no going back.
My mother's level of enthusiasm about discovering this new form of communication was only matched by the level of despair my brother and I felt. Over the months each of us had new ideas about the names, which ranged from 'Mad House' to 'The Fantastic 4' to 'Samin is adopted'; however the content kept recurring back to links about how AIDS is making a comeback in teens and the rare fatal skin diseases you can get from eating cheese.
I must warn you that in said WhatsApp group, you need to refrain from using shorthand; it'll only make the conversation longer. Commenting a simple 'idk' will result in five more messages explaining to your mother what it stands for and answering why its difficult for you to just type out three little words. This in turn will turn into a lecture on how the young generation is so adamant on taking the easy way out these days. It really isn't worth it.
The thing about the family WhatsApp group is, when you think about it, nothing significant ever really happens. It's just you and your siblings not being able to use the 'I forgot' excuse about attending a dawaat because your mom already reminded you in the WhatsApp group and she knows you've seen it, she saw the two little green ticks. It's your dad butt-texting random alphabets, and finally it's a full blown Sherlock investigation hub about who the mystery girl is on your brother's profile picture.
And as if the immediate family WhatsApp group wasn't overbearing enough, then you may find yourself added to the extended family WhatsApp group. You'll have to look at pictures of your cousin's family who went to Maldives while you're sitting at home with your math book. One aunt will flaunt her perfect daughter's perfect grades while your mother is too embarrassed to share yours. Then there's that one uncle who needs to greet good mornings and goodnights every day, without fail, to pile up your notifications.
When things in the family WhatsApp group get a little too much, you move to the fringe family WhatsApp group, where it's just you and a bunch of trusted cousins mocking the things that happen in the actual WhatsApp group and devise plans on how to avoid going to a dawaat.
At the end of the day though, family WhatsApp group keep us anchored to our families amidst our fast paced lives. It allows us to stay informed about everything that's going on with our family afar and abroad. And let's face it, it's not like you can leave the group. The best you can do is just keep it muted and avoid WhatsApp profile pictures in general.
Samin Sabah Islam believes there are very few problems in life, if any, that a good nap can't fix. If she isn't asleep, your queries may be answered at sabahsamin11@gmail.com.