Struggles of being a Wingwoman
We are all familiar with the idea of a wingwoman – the "brozoned" girl who helps to set you up with other girls. She will go the extra mile to decrease your chances of being #foreveralone, usually out of kindness, but sometimes because she wants to get a lot of treats.
If you're a wingwoman, the female BFF of a guy, or somewhere in between, you should know how it feels like to get him a date. There is a lot of fuss about how he should approach her without making things creepy and obvious. He will expect you to be his dating etiquette book – asking you for advice and throwing a yeah-whatever look when you pick out his faults, but then end up rushing to your doorstep if anything goes wrong. Sometimes, you have to third wheel. You have to endure that awkward PDA (which will only remind you of how single you are) and witness pointless arguments about which movie they will watch. Occasionally, you have to crack "yo mama" jokes to keep their conversation alive.
The planning of your missions will be entirely your responsibility. It is fun, but rather tiring. Their relationship problems will consist of things you have never encountered, but you will be needed to solve them somehow otherwise he will start wallowing as if it was the end of the world. It doesn't matter if you are watching chick flicks with PMS on peak or having a headache the size of your mom's biryani vessel. He will always be there waiting for you to solve the problem. It is also more likely that he will appoint you to buy presents for his girlfriend. If you don't, you should be ready to receive endless calls in the middle of your class about which makeup brand is better than the other or which palette is a better bargain. Welcome to the club, boy. Even I'm forever confused about buying makeup for myself.
Since girls tend to understand other girls, it is usually wingwomen who prove more successful in comparison to wingmen. Whether it is needed to confront that angry girl whom he dumped big time or her friends who want him to drink a big cup of cyanide, wingwomen are usually needed to fix the issues. I have had to solve countless problems like that, and fall into trouble in front of teachers and parents. I have been questioned, is it worth the struggle?
Honestly, I don't know. It just seems like that part of our adolescence when we do a lot of idiotic acts, which they say makes it easier for us to solve our problems in the future. Probably thirty years from now, I will be remembering these memories while laughing hysterically with my lonely self.
Zarin Rayhana is a self-aggrandizing ambivert who ponders over philosophical epiphanies during rainy evenings and waits for her crush to jump straight out of her favorite novel. Treat her with novel suggestions at ericaavianazarin@gmail.com