Published on 12:00 AM, September 28, 2017

Riding the murir tin like a pro

I have a love-hate relationship with the public bus. It's one of the most integral parts of my everyday commute. The rides are as cheap as a packet of jhalmuri but it's safe to say it's not going to be a joyride if you don't take a few precautions. 

ALWAYS GET THE WINDOW SEAT

This step is more of a survival instinct. Let me paint you a picture: buses ALWAYS take more passengers than they can accommodate which means it's going to get immensely hot and suffocating. The people start sweating and it smells. And if the bus is stuck on Kazi Nazrul Islam Avenue or anywhere near Farmgate, then may God be with you. However, if you have the glorious window seat, you have the access to the gentle breeze and save yourself from the heat and stink inside the bus. The bonus here is that when you see vehicles on the other side moving, you'll feel a rush of optimism that you will indeed reach home...at some point.

NEVER FORGET YOUR EARPHONES 

If I've learnt anything in my years of riding the bus, it's that more than the physical discomfort itself, it's the boredom that'll drive you crazy. Let's face reality here, if you're in Dhaka, traffic jam is a part and parcel of your life and you never know when a mere 45-minute commute turns into a 5-hour quest. Once you've plugged in the earphones, you can mute everything and distract yourself. And for a short while, you will feel invincible and not bothered by the random stranger snoring on your shoulder. 

NEVER TAKE YOUR PHONE OUT OF THE BAG

They are always watching. They will follow your bus window to trace you till the bus stops at a signal, to take the one thing that you love the most. Yes, I'm talking about your phone. You might wonder how a chhintaikari would steal a phone from a bus window that's set so high. You, my friend, are completely underestimating how skilled these individuals are. If you must take a phone call, remember to always hold your phone against the ear that's away from the window. Pro-tip: be extra careful when you're at Gulistan, Farmgate and Asad Gate, as snatchers are typically busy there. 

KNOW YOUR ROUTES

If you're a first timer on the bus, make sure you know beforehand which buses go by your required route and always ask the conductor to remind you when your stop is approaching. You don't want to end up in Mirpur and lose communication with civilisation.

Lastly, carry a bottle of water with you always. Good luck to you, grasshopper.

Nazifa is a paranoid teen who obsesses over the use of memes and music in order to tackle real life problems. Send help at nazia45678@gmail.com