Life in a Boarding School

When I think of boarding schools, I immediately picture Hogwarts: the majestic Great Hall; the immaculate Quidditch Pitch; the Library, rich with the musty smell of ancient books; the cozy common rooms with fires crackling away at a steady rhythm; an unceasing rush of students, moving on from one activity to the next…it's an idea we've loved since childhood. But is the truth farther from or closer to the idyllic image we've grown up with? 

On the surface, the life of a boarding school student and that of a typical school/college student is one and the same. They face the same stresses and pressures of academic curriculum. They, too, participate in numerous team and individual sports, ranging from handball and basketball to table tennis and scrabble. They are sorted into houses that they must represent for the duration of their boarding life. They also participate in a multitude of extra-curricular activities such as community service and annual excursions. Really, how is life any different?

I remember the very first day of second grade. During roll call, the new kid in the room raised his hand, mumbled an incoherent "present, sir" and proceeded on to say, "I want to go home. I miss home." Without a doubt, the unbearable pain of being away from one's family, especially at such a young age, is a sentiment that every boarder is familiar with. Most schools only enroll students in the entry classes, usually the sixth grade; at the tender age of 13, hours of apparent solitude is agonising – these children face it for months on end. The forced separation prevents many students from building intimate relationships with siblings and close relatives. There are days when the loneliness of being one's sole caretaker becomes much too overwhelming; days when the four walls of the dorm room start to feel like the interior of a prison cell; days when you feverishly anticipate the next time you'll get to see your family; days when it's almost impossible to find a silver lining.  

"For me, the hardest part of being in a boarding school was making that transition from being dependent on my family to being fully self-sufficient," said Myat Moe Khaing Michelle, an alumnus of Feni Girls' Cadet College. "I had to be self-aware early on – washing clothes, making the bed, cleaning out the locker, remembering to eat, sleep and study on time. I had such a busy schedule every day that I rarely had time to be sad. Although it was difficult initially, it bestowed upon me important life lessons, discipline and responsibility." 

Indeed, training themselves to be independent and self-reliant is the most crucial aspect of this experience. Paradoxically, most boarders also agree that the time away from home is a lesson in cooperation and teamwork. "Your friends become a surrogate family. Disciplinary issues, bad grades, stress of meeting expectations, homesickness, late-night philosophical debates, and squabbles with friends – we ended up sharing every moment of our lives with one another. The immediate batches are very close and their intimacy is at the level of friendship. It's like living within a community; it cannot function without unity," said Masroor Faiyaz, an alumnus of Faujdarhat Cadet College. 

A typical day for a boarder is so full of activity that it's difficult to keep track of time. The day generally starts off at 6 am. After PT and breakfast, classes commence at 8 am and continue till lunch time. After lunch, all students are expected to participate in a wide array of sports activities such as hockey, football, basketball, cricket, handball, rugby, tennis and squash. After evening prayers, students head towards prep time. At the end of yet another hectic day, boarders are allowed some free time before lights out. Leisure time is generally spent playing cricket, table tennis, watching TV, reading the paper – occasionally indulging in illicit expeditions like climbing the trees in the yard and collecting mangoes – or according to Michelle, "Sleeping, by far, the best utilisation of free time." 

Although united in mischief, most boarders take peer-competition very seriously. "Students are very competitive, mostly in extra-curricular activities," said Tahmid Rahman Minar, a student of Military Collegiate School of Khulna. "The separate houses are even awarded points on the basis of criteria such as inspection and hygiene. The winning house receives a trophy at the end of the year. For most, it's a very coveted honour." 

The strict adherence to rules, the refusal to compromise predetermined standards, the allegiance to discipline and punctuality, the pressures of meeting seemingly unattainable standards – the question arises, is there any scope for self-actualisation in such an environment? Can students afford to make mistakes? Do they really learn to cope with the real world from within their carefully-controlled domain? "My experiences here have taught me a lot of things about life, most importantly, the value of family. I've also learnt to deal with authority. It was a hard-earned lesson that not all authority is helpful, but the experience teaches you to deal with authority that you may not agree with. But, at the end of the day, there's no sugar-coating the truth – you're stuck in a box," said Minar. 

At this point, I bet you're faced with the same dilemma as I am. Curiously, most boarders seemed to share my sentiment on the matter. Just like Minar, they harbour mixed feelings regarding their experiences and yet, they wouldn't trade it for anything else. When asked about expressing their individuality and the boarding life's influence on it, they had similar opinions: the rigorous standards of boarding schools only seemed to push them harder, strive for better versions of themselves and never compromise personal standards. Instead of stifling creativity, discipline only seemed to amplify it. "The thing about boarding life is, you may be stuck in a box," Minar smiled, "but it's a very well-furnished, beautiful box. Whether you choose to use its contents or focus on what's missing, depends entirely upon you."