Published on 12:00 AM, August 07, 2021

Retraction Act allowing govt to change decision any time passed in parliament

Flipflopping on decisions and positions has become enshrined in law in Chapasthan. 

A parliament session decided that under the Retraction Act, which has wide-ranging and ever-evolving power, the government will be able to change any policy decision at any time.

Also under the act, no one will be allowed on the streets unless they go right back in again, and then emerge outside again, said a lawmaker who had nothing to do with the decision.

Amid the pandemic, no one can wear masks for more than a minute, said the lawmaker -- also a minister of a ministry that too had nothing to do with the decision or its implementation -- on Tuesday. 

The following day, he flipflopped and said people have to wear masks on Sundays, Tuesdays and Thursdays and go without masks on Mondays, Wednesdays, Fridays and Saturdays. Every other month, the days of the week to wear and not wear masks will flip, he added.

"I did not say that," he said an hour later.

The development, as far as this correspondent can recall, has its roots in the arrest of some rape accused, the release of the said accused and the subsequent arrest of the complainant.

"We found the people who were first arrested to be very powerful," a government official had said on condition of anonymity. "Arresting them would have hurt our country economically. Moreover, keeping them unhappy would have been no better. So we arrested the source of their unhappiness."

It was then that the value of the flipflop was realised. The government found they could be on both sides of an issue, and so keep both sides happy -- although not simultaneously.

There were some who criticised the lack of clarity in decisions, and to neutralise those backward-thinking people, ruling-party lawmakers decided to introduce the new law in parliament.

Whenever the more powerful side in a debate or issue is unhappy, government decisions can be changed, according to article 4 (or was it 8?) of the Retraction Act.

An amendment is already in the works to criminalise non-flipfloppers, sources said.

"As a nation of flipfloppers, we can be ever flexible and therefore can react to all outcomes," the unrelated minister said.  

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