Published on 12:00 AM, July 15, 2023

Introvert who can’t carry conversation shouts ‘that’s crazy’ in every reply

A woman pictured with her entire arsenal of small-talk topics. Photo: Rodion Kutsaiev

Even at the age of 26, Syeda Chupchap Komkotha, a recent university graduate, struggles to socialise. It's not like she isn't interesting or doesn't have quirky insights to share, it's more of a general disinterest towards other human affairs.  

But more often than not, she is mistaken for being "too pretentious", although it's just mostly her minding her own business.

During her university days (thanks to the open credit system), she got away with just being by herself, submitting assignments, attending class, and giving exams. But after getting into the high-stakes modern *coughs capitalist* working environment, she realised that the scenario had to change. 

Now she's expected to be in contact with several people for her own work, and minding her own business just meant eventually, nothing will get done. As a person wildly obsessed with collectibles, she knew she had to make a tradeoff.

And so as a very last resort, Komkotha decided to try out the Beshikotha Bootcamp (BB) that popped on her newsfeed one day.

"Welcome to the Corporate Conversations Bootcamp. I'm your trainer, Shakil, and I'm here to mold you into top-tier corporate communicators. Today, we'll be focusing on navigating those treacherous waters of small talk and office chit-chat."

One of the attendees, Ajib Ashraf, raised their hand.

"Uh, yeah, I'm not really sure why I need to learn small talk. I mean, I'm here to work, not chat."

"Ah, excellent point, Ajib. But remember, the art of small talk is the secret sauce that oils the wheels of corporate camaraderie. It's how you build those all-important 'networking' relationships that lead you to unlock your dreams," says Shakil, with a smile wide as the Cheshire cat.

Although the whole workshop seemed quite creepy, but at the end of the day, Komkotha figured out her Holy Grail – she knew the perfect combination of words, the phrase that is going save her butt.

The next day as she sat down to work, her usual chatty coworker Bachal Belal came over to her desk. He went on and on about his son's diaper expenses and unionising for pay. Komkotha smiled and nodded, just as Shakil had instructed. She zoned out thinking if Belal had spent a fifth of his chat and smoke breaks, he would've gotten the raise he had been complaining about.

Just when it seemed like Belal huffed out all his words, Komkotha laughs out and says, "That's craaaazy!"

"I know! You know you're pretty great to talk to," replies Belal.

Komkotha grinned, and thought, "That's craaaaazy" .