Requiem for a friend

The passed away, in his sleep, I hear; leaving us, his family and friends, to awaken to his unfathomable, unacceptable absence, almost as resounding as his laughter, his jovial voice, and his life-affirming joyful presence.

The rest of the media world, where my friend made his indelible mark, mourns and eulogises him as Syed Fahim Munaim, CEO & Chief Editor of Maasranga; a former Executive Editor of The Daily Star; Press Secretary to a caretaker government and press counselor to the Bangladesh embassy in Japan, and many other avatars.

For me, he was and will always remain Tipu, the slight framed, laughing, flamboyant brotherly figure I encountered at Dhaka University, both of us in the final stages of our teens, fellow students in the newly opened department of International Relations. 

It was the start of our journey of friendship, indeed, the journey of our future, curiously linked, since we both left Dhaka University (in my case, within the first year) and found ourselves in the US, due to separate family circumstances, and later entered the world of journalism, both associated with The Daily Star, and more importantly, connected by his marriage to someone whom I consider to be like my younger sister. 

I joined the University of Dhaka in the early 70s and within the next year, I got married and was swept away to the shores of Maryland, US, where I joined the university at College Park, happy to restart life as an undergraduate, studying Comparative and English Literature, which was always my first love. Tipu's father, Syed Nuruddin, had just been posted to Washington as the Press Attaché, and at an embassy reception, I was thrilled to be reunited with my class friend. He was then enrolled in the George Mason University's Public Administration department. 

In those first years of homesickness, it was a blessing to have not just the sight of Tipu's familiar, ever-smiling face and encounter his humorous bonhomie, but also the warmth and affection generated by the network of Bangali families, among whom were his wonderful parents and three sisters. One of the other families, who became for my husband and I, almost in loco parentis, not in the strict legal terms, but within the terms of human relationships and emotions, was the family of the beautiful and accomplished girl, who later would become Tipu's wife and soul mate. To this wonderful family, which showered me and my husband with love and affection in those early years, we can never repay our gratitude; and today, I extend to them as to that lovely and loving younger sister, my heartfelt condolences. I can only say that my husband and I share completely in their grief. We are equally bereft of the wonderful human being that was Tipu, and we are together in our prayers for his soul.

Fahim Munaim, was a generous, positive and supportive friend, whose witty and endearing company enriched you. In my career as a writer and columnist, he appeared at many junctures, encouraging and supporting me. My favourite memory is when he spoke at the book launch of my first book, the collection of columns I wrote for a decade for The Daily Star: 'An Abiding City: Ruminations from Rome'. For me, it mattered that he was the one to represent The Daily Star at an important moment in my life.

Fahim kept all our university friends together, getting the old International Relations buddies to come together at reunions. His friendship and warm personality was one of the things I always looked forward to during my winter trips home to Dhaka. It will be a cold homecoming in many senses, this December, my friend.

You may have left us, Tipu, but we refuse to leave you. Your memories and your beaming persona will remain the light by which you will glow in our midst. Refusing to say goodbye, dear friend. Rest in eternal peace.

The writer is an author and columnist.