COVER STORY
Mummy knows best?
A mother's love for her child is often fierce, loyal and protective. While it can be argued that her actions are instinctive — a design of nature — some mothers do cross the line between 'protectiveness' and 'possessiveness'.
"Generally, just as any mother of any species, all are biologically hard wired to protect the child from birth. The difference is every other animal eventually lets their offspring be, but the humans continue to nurture and care for the offspring well into adulthood."
"Considering the current social status, with so much danger towards the children, mothers are definitely more protective. But there is a well-defined line between being protective and being possessive" — opines Dr. Mehtab Khanam, PhD., Professor and Chairperson, Department of Educational and Counselling Psychology, University of Dhaka.
Just as it is necessary to let a child be independent, fearless and confident it is also necessary to set boundaries. These boundaries of course need to be adjusted as the child grows- all within limit.
Dr Khanam continued, "There is a certain amount of learning involved in this from the mother's side. At times, it will be hard to face the fact that the child is actually an adult and s/he needs that space. As for unwarranted possessiveness and the like, it boils down to what the mother nurtured from the beginning of the child's life. Again, as a conscious individual, a mother can readily address this from the start by accepting the inevitable changes."