Published on 04:45 PM, January 28, 2023

#Perspective

Note to a twenty-something, my younger self

Photo: Collected

As we navigate through our teenage years and into our twenties, we are faced with a multitude of experiences and lessons that shape who we are and who we will become. Looking back, there is always that one thing that we wish we had known earlier — something that would have made our journey a little bit easier. For me, that one thing is the power of self-care and self-love.

The practice of taking care of oneself, both physically and psychologically, is known as self-care. It encompasses everything from getting enough sleep and exercise to managing stress and practising mindfulness.
Self-love, on the other hand, is the acceptance and appreciation of oneself, flaws and all. It is the foundation upon which healthy relationships and self-esteem are built. I wish I had known the importance of self-care and self-love before my mid-twenties. Growing up, I was always told to put others first and prioritise their needs above mine. While this may seem like a noble sentiment, it led to me neglecting my own well-being and feeling guilty for taking care of myself.

Sure, there will be more ups and downs in one's life than you can count. Some of them can be emotionally devastating. But how do you pick yourself up from that place? In short, answer, give yourself the time to process. In a world of quick relief and rebounds, we are led to believe in forgetting and moving on to something better. While the latter part may be true, we inadvertently forget one crucial aspect, processing one's grief.

It was not until I hit my mid-twenties that I realised the detrimental effects of neglecting my own needs and how important it was to prioritise self-care and self-love. Accept that something terrible has happened to you. Give yourself downtime to self-reflect, recollect and be emotionally stable. Contrary to popular belief, solitude can play a big role in soul searching; not only does it help you to be honest with yourself, but it also grounds you on a much-exposed level to yourself. Before you know it, you will be taking yourself out on a date, going on a shopping spree, or just enjoying life in its truest sense.

Practising self-care and self-love has helped me to become more resilient and better able to handle the stresses of daily life. It has also helped me develop healthier relationships with others, as I can now set boundaries and communicate my needs effectively. I have also found that my self-esteem has dramatically improved as I have learned to accept and appreciate myself for who I am.

I wish I had known the importance of self-care and self-love before my mid-twenties. It would have saved me a lot of unnecessary stress and heartache. I encourage others to prioritise self-care and self-love in their lives, no matter what stage of life they are in. It's always possible to start taking care of yourself and loving yourself. It will make your journey through life a lot more manageable and enjoyable.