Types of Book Hoarders
Books are, without a doubt, the closest things to magical objects on Earth. They have the power to transport their reader to distant lands. They can portray magnificent dances in ballrooms and bloodbaths out on the war fronts. A well-written book can give rise to an array of emotions - joy, despair, anger, and more.
Being as amazing as they are, books attract a variety of humans. While many are casual readers, there is a large number of people who take reading to a whole new level. They are not satisfied with trips to the library and downloading e-books to complete their reading experience. Instead, they believe in collecting books, inhaling the unique smell of each page, and holding the sacred objects with their own fingers. While they may agree on this central point, book hoarders differ greatly in many other aspects. So here are examples of a few types of book hoarders I've come across over the years.
AESTHETIC BOOK HOARDERS
Aesthetic book hoarders are those who, aside from having a great collection of books, also have the talent of photographing them perfectly. Their shelves are a book lover's dream, with books arranged according to size and/or colour in immaculate rows. These readers can often be seen tripping over fairy lights, or maybe on the hunt for the perfect photo angle, when their noses aren't buried in said books, of course.
"DYING TO GET THROUGH MY TBR LIST!"
There are certain book hoarders who are caught in a vicious cycle of sorts. Every reader has a to-be-read list that consists of titles they've been dying to read. However, some of these readers completely forget the existence of their TBR lists as soon as they set foot in a bookstore. Instead, they buy completely random books which seem appealing and burn through their budget. Once they get home, though, they begin pining for all those books on their TBR, and vow to return to the shop to collect said books, and promptly forget their vow upon setting foot in a bookshop again. And so the cycle continues.
NOT-SO-ORGANISED HOARDERS
This is the group of people who have books strewn across their entire house. Their shelves have been filled to maximum capacity for quite a while, but their book hoarding habits have only increased. As a result, you will find psychological thrillers scattered across their desks, steamy romance paperbacks lying on their couch, and so on. These are the readers who run a high risk of having mental breakdowns after misplacing a beloved book, and of buying the same book twice.
HUNGOVER HOARDERS
Once upon a time, The Hungover Hoarder read a book, or a series, that had a huge impact on him or her both emotionally and spiritually. Ever since, nothing seems to even come close to that special book or series for this reader, no matter how well written it is. No plot line seems as enthralling; no character is as lovable. Although you might see The Hungover Hoarder purchasing a variety of books from time to time, he/she will go home only to read the same book or series all over again.
THE HIGHLY OPINIONATED CRITICS
Book hoarders usually devote all of their free time (or just, all of their time in general) to either reading or buying new books. There are a select few who also set aside some time to analyse books, line by line, and share their reviews with others. Now, a lot of people put up short reviews of their recent reads to share their thoughts, but Opinionated Critics do a lot more than that. First, they form a very decided opinion on the book. Then they compile a list of reasons to justify their feelings. With a clever use of large adjectives and bullet points, they present their case to fellow readers in a very persuasive manner. While they may read a wide range of books, they will almost always find at least one fault in each read. Moreover, no matter how much you reason with them, they will not be dissuaded from their original opinions. However, these people and their detailed reviews are definitely helpful when you are trying to make decisions about which books are worth reading. At least, I hope we're helpful for something and not just pretentious snobs, since I'm clearly a member of this group.
No matter which group they belong to, book hoarders may come across as a bit too intense, or a tad bit unhinged. In all honesty though, they're just trying to escape reality for a while and forget about their own pointless existence. Plus, it's better to be sniffing books rather than sniffing glue, anyway.
Despite being a hopeless fangirl, Marisha Aziz lives under delusions of awesomeness. Contact her at [email protected] to give her another excuse to ignore her teetering pile of life problems.
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