Parent-Child Communication 101
Bottling up emotions and feelings will never do you any good. Getting a view about different issues in your life from different perspectives is important. Of course, most of us run to our best friends to have a heart-to-heart, but you see, parents can help you out too. Listed below are a few pointers on maintaining a healthy communication channel between you and your parents:
Remember, they're always there for you
Your parents are your day one homies. Whether your mom is your best friend or that overly stern figure with a hanger ready to beat you, all they really want is the best for you. As for the dads, well, they tend to have more on their mind and are somewhat passive listeners but if you're closer to your dad, it's all the same. If something is really bothering you, just know that you can always count on them. A peer isn't always the best idea when you're in deep trouble; it's nice to take advice from someone older. Chances are, your parents have been there, done that.
Maintain regular chats with them
One of my favourite high school teachers once said "a dining table should be equally filled with food and chatter, if that's not the matter then you better sort it out". After a long day, it's usually during dinner when the whole family gets to sit and have a meal together. Your job as a child is to share some of the things from your day with them. Ask your parents and siblings how their day went, share a joke you heard, talk about a recent movie, anything. Talking to your parents about your everyday life helps in strengthening the bond and also helps them trust you more.
Prepare yourself if you want to share something serious
If you want to raise a difficult topic, something you know your parents might overreact to (because you know, they care about you a lot) make sure you know what you're going to say. Whatever it is, an exam you failed or talking about something that has been on your mind; take some time and think about how you are going to bring it up. Don't beat around the bush, it's better to be straight forward in these situations. Think about the possibilities, what's the worst that might happen, how they'll react. Expect some harsh criticism and put downs. But don't avoid this because of fear. Take a deep breath and go for it!
Take it all in and know where to stop
Your parents will get side tracked if you start whining. Just keep it real and be honest. Listen to every single word they are saying closely. Make sure you are a reflective listener; don't just let it all go above your head. Question their views if you want but do not stretch out the talk. Parents over analyze things so just stick to the things you had in your mind. Once you've touched all bases, you're good to go.
Faria Khan is an ambivert who truly believes in the divine power of music. Give her a piece of your mind at [email protected]
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