PLANET RS
Yellow. And pink. Colours are so powerful at conjuring emotions; people spend millions trying to get the right colour to convey the right message. Fast food chains try to own the colours red and yellow because that's what gets you hungry. What do we do at RS? We like all the colours. Every time. Because each colour tells a story. This week, it's yellow. And pink. Apparently, pink is voted the colour for Valentine. Speaking of which, we've got some tips on protecting your savings and some insight into how love starts early, kindergarten probably. And the readers pitched in with their thoughts on the two upcoming days of celebration. It's not all yellow and pink.
-- Ehsanur Raza Ronny, Editor, RS
The Ballad of the Friendzone
Anyone who wastes enough time on the internet is familiar with the meme “one does not simply walk into Mordor.” But even walking into Mordor dressed as Santa Claus with a sign around your neck saying “I have the One Ring” is easier than getting out of the place all men dread. The Friendzone (cue dramatic music).
Imagine a building made of glass - and outside you see all the hopes and aspirations you ever had. Outside lies freedom, the Holy Grail. But the building has no doors. And it is guarded by laser tripped booby traps, a shoal of Piranhas, the Red Army and Gandalf. No way you shall pass. This is the friendzone, a place where all men have been and all men dread ending up permanently. This is the stuff of nightmares - even Chuck Norris is said to fear the zone. And every guy who is reading this knows why.
Countless revolutions have taken place to get out of the friendzone, to friendzone the girls first, to just walk out of this god-forsaken place. To no avail. Valiant lives have been given, valuable time wasted. To no avail. Remember Ross from Friends? He was the Mayor of the friendzone - it took him years to get out. And even that was by sheer luck.
JD form Scrubs had this theory, that if a guy fails to act within 48 hours of a turning point situation, he ends up forever in the zone. And while that may be true, there are those who were born to live in the zone, listen to sad, catchy songs and then die there forever alone.
Countless theories have been postulated to ascertain the purpose of this place. Some said this is Nature's way of mocking the weak links: the slow and clueless. For all we know, everyone's been there and those who say otherwise are lying.
But most guys have the power to simply ignore the zone and move on. They are the comparatively lucky ones. They will go for the next one in line and boldly state they have never been in the zone. Yeah, like anyone believes them (we're looking at you, Munawar).
But for the forever alones out there, do not give up hope. Even Frodo made it into Mordor eventually. Learn to ignore this place. Rise up against this fortress and maybe someday, someday in the distant future, men will sing songs about us who fought to rid the world of this evil. Till then good luck and a not so happy Valentine's Day.
By The New Mayor of the Zone
Pahela Falgun to-do list
What are the top 3 things on your Pahela Falgun to-do list?. OTHER than going out to look at girls
(or guys).
Mahtab Ahmed
1. Wake up
2. Anticipate the next important day. i.e. 14th feb.
3. Go to sleep in a chilled mode. Lolz
Kazi Akib Bin Asad
1. Think yellow.
2. See yellow.
3. Wear green. Or some other colour.
Ahmed Hasan Sami
1, 2, and 3 - 10:30 pm- ''Hey mom, is it Pohela Falgun? Today?''
Mustabeen Qazi
Study for yet another model test.
Ehsanur Raza Ronny
Remember NOT to drive into areas like old town and high court areas.
Mustabeen Qazi
Sigh when I realise I can't go out in a pretty saree that day, then laugh at the girls' mime artist makeup.
Nazia Hasan
1. Look at my own guy.
2. Make him stunned with my own looks.
3. Come out of office earlier than usual then meet friends. ;)
Shafqat Shafiq
I live in Shegun Bagicha (Beside Shilpakala Academy and a stone's throw from Ramna Park). I curse the cultural intellectuals and the native musicians for destroying my beauty sleep early in the morning, and keeping at it for the whole day.
Arisa Misaki
1. Get prepared for model test.
2. Curse my fate for the day.
3. Plan to hide in the house for the day that comes next (14th Feb).
Osama King Rahman
Is it a holiday? Do I Get a sandwich? Wiz Khalifa: Black and Yellow. Depends really.
Medha Monjaury
Try to remember to not forget to wish my dad a happy birthday, forget anyway, and get outshined by little sister who never forgets, but never reminds me either.
Muhtasim Shams Dibbo
A black and yellow sandwich?
Stuff our readers had to say
Sharfuzzaman Sifat
Speaking of good food, check out La Bamba in Dhanmondi. Great taste, cheap and the mayonnaise is irresistible (hoping they might give me discounts, if they somehow see this post).
Such shameless name dropping. Our outrage is outmatched only by our outstanding eagerness for a share of said discount. -- RS
Sukanya Fuad
The mere sight of a name made me smile this week. Like the old times... when I used to wait for days and wonder what S. N. Rasul would write next. Really good to have him back. Please don't disappear again without any notice.
We got a few more posts and e-mails along these lines. None of them can still tell us what Rasul was talking about. We're losing faith in Rasul fans.~ RS
Mushfiq Redwanuz Zaman
Hurray for the peeing dog. Btw, doesn't it at least deserve a real name?
To RS fans, his name is Boo. By thieves, he is called The Smelly One. To the owner's of the laptops he pees on, we print that name!” -- RS
Siham Sarawat
Who would you choose as woman of the year 2011, it is indeed an award winning essay, and also an inspiring article.
Jannatul Ruhan Raha
Finally the acknowledgement of primitive invocation's awesomeness :D
