ISHtupid
inventions
CNG vehicles
Cow natural gari. This is an extremely fuel efficient one cowpower
car. It is environment friendly in several ways. Fuel consumption
is very low. In fact, when you are thirsty it will provide you with
some fuel instead(milk). Its exhaust(dung) can be used for plants.
And the two different horn both verbal(moo) and physical can be used
to effectively moo, I mean, shoo the people away.
Perpetual
bullets
Wars cost lives and it's a bad thing despite the fact that it helps
to keep the population down. For this, new perpetual bullets will
be made that, once fired, will keep on going for a set duration like
one month. These will go through whatever is in the way and will keep
traveling within a set area. The bullets fired from both sides will
knock each other out. Whichever side has the most bullets remaining
will win the war. Of course, to actually get into the firing zone
and to count the bullets one may be shot in crossfire. For this reason
we will have special police forces nab dangerous criminals and ask
them to go count the bullets in the area of crossfire.
Instant
cosmetic surgery machine
Some days you do not feel like yourself and this machine will help
you feel like whoever you feel on those days. Inspired by Michael
Jackson this machine will allow you to become anybody at will within
2 minutes like Maggie Jackson Noodles. Simply remove your nose, enter
face and three minutes later you will look like a different person(or
space alien).
Chewer
for slow chewers
Some people take a long time to eat because they chew very slowly.
This device attaches to the side of your face and chews your food
for you. This way all you have to do is swallow. It comes with realistic
chomping sounds. These will be supplied to government offices where
lunch breaks extend for several hours. Presumably, the food takes
a long time to chew.
Mini
grappling hook for grabbing buses
What with rickshaws being removed from the streets the public is being
left with no choice but to run after buses. Unfortunately, this become
s a very difficult task as the buses are always moving when you want
them to stop and stopping when you want them to move. You cannot be
Spiderman but at least you can use this mini grappling hook to attach
to the bus as it passes by. When you near your office just latch onto
the building.
Portable
smoking room
People are becoming increasingly conscious and irritated by smoking
and its effects. But there are still those individuals who like to
enjoy the pleasure of slowly killing themselves. For these individuals
the portable smoking chamber can be worn over the head that will not
bother others.
By
Ronny and Shiplu
How
to lose a girl inseven days!
So, you're stuck again, huh? You've been flirting with her for quite
a while now, thinking that she's open-minded enough to flirt back...
just for the sake of the sport. Only, now she thinks that she's your
girl friend! She's calling you up in the weirdest of hours, and is
insisting to talk to you even when your mom says that you're in the
toilet...
Not only that,
SHE'S EVEN SCARING THE OTHER GRRRLS AWAY FROM YOU!
Ah, well folks!
If you've tried various schemes to get rid of her and are still unsuccessful,
take a shot at this seven-day procedure. Trust me... by the end of
the week she'll not only stop calling you, but she'll actually run
away every time the two of you come face to face...
Best of luck.
Monday: Call her
'dude', and pretend she's a guy.
Tuesday: Call her up in the middle of the night and sing her the theme
song of Crown Energy Drink.
Wednesday: Tell her that it's actually her mom, you're after.
Thursday: Don't take a shower. Don't use any deodorant.
Friday: Take her to a Prometheus concert.
Saturday: Tell her that you're allergic to high voltage-romance, and
that your nose starts running every time you go to kiss someone.
If, none of the plans had worked, just call her up on Sunday and tell
her that she looks like wannabe Shakira. That will do the trick.
Disclaimer: This article is a work of fiction. Any resemblance to
any one living, dead or simply moronic (refer to the last paragraph)
is purely coincidental.
By
Tawsif
Do
it yourself:
Wild Wire Bracelet
What You Need:
18-gauge metallic or plastic-covered wire in blue, red, yellow, green,
and purple
Wire cutters
Hand drill
Cup hooks
Tape
Needle-nose pliers
Round pencil
5--3/8-inch O rings (available in hardware and home supply stores);
round toothpick
Instructions:
To make a blue S bead, cut a 12-inch piece of wire; fold it in half.
Place the cup hook in the drill as a bit. Place the wire loop over
the hook. Tape the wire ends to a work surface and crank the drill
handle. Use pliers to shape ends into coils that form an S.
To make a red
loop bead, cut a 5-inch length of wire. Wrap the centre of the wire
around a round pencil three times; remove from pencil. Gently pull
loops slightly apart and flatten. Form wire ends into open loops.
To make a twisted
yellow bead, cut a 12-inch piece of wire. Fold it in half. Place the
fold of the wire in the drill; turn to twist. Wrap the centre of the
wire around a round pencil five times; remove. Gently pull loops apart.
Use pliers to tuck wire ends into bead center.
To make a green
bead, cut a 4-inch length of wire. Wrap around a toothpick to shape.
To make a purple
spiral bead, cut a 10-inch length of wire. Wrap the wire around a
pencil three times as shown in. Use pliers to shape the ends into
loops as in.
Cut short pieces
of red wire to attach the beads to the O rings.
NOTE:
For the yellow, green, and purple beads, the red wire is threaded
through the bead before the end loops are shaped. To attach the S
bead, shape red wire into O shapes. Pinch the wire end loops closed
with pliers.