Stop it now
Kalpona Akter Parvin was 13 years old when she was forcibly married to her husband Saidul Islam, who also demanded Tk 40,000 as dowry. Kalpona's mother managed to give him Tk 15,000 but could not afford the rest of the amount. A few days after the marriage took place, Saidul said he was not willing to continue living with Kalpona. But the village people intervened and arranged a mutual understanding, and so he took her back to his house.
Although they remained together, theirs was a relationship full of unrest. Saidul physically abused Kalpona, stating that he wanted more money. Saidul worked in a fabric making store in Pabna where acid is used in fabric colouring. One night, he brought acid to his house and poured some into sleeping Kalpona's mouth, with the intent to kill her. Her tongue melted into her lower jaw and she cannot speak properly anymore.
Kalpona's story might not be the same for other women, but the underlying facts are all shockingly similar. Perhaps all perpetrators of violence against women do not have such open access to acid. Perhaps they do not demand a huge dowry. But more often than not, women are subject to some form of abuse in their households, by their husbands or in-laws. The Bangladesh Demographic Health Survey 2007 revealed that more than one-third of both men and women believe that men are justified in beating their wives in specific circumstances, such as arguing. In Bangladesh, violence starts at home, and for the most part, it is completely ignored. The ugly truth is, we all know women who face violence but are helpless in the face of societal pressures.
According to the nationwide survey titled "Violence Against Women Survey 2011" conducted by Bangladesh Bureau of Statistics in collaboration with the United Nations Population Fund, 87 percent of married women are abused by their husbands, with most of them facing violence in the last twelve months, which implies they are abused on a regular basis. Fifty percent of women facing abuse had to seek medical help. A study conducted by the International Centre for Diarrhoeal Diseases Research, Bangladesh (icddr,b) called "Men's attitudes and practices regarding gender and violence against women 2011" found that a large majority of men in Bangladesh rape because they perceive sex as their entitlement.
"As a civil society, we can increase people's awareness on violence against women and facilitate the support services such as legal and medical help, but justice is in the hands of the policymakers and law enforcers," said Rina Roy, director (rights division) of Manusher Jonno Foundation.
"The prevalence of violence against women will only decline when cases are handled in a transparent manner, with effective punishment sentenced to the perpetrators," Roy added. The case of Kalpona is evidence of this appalling flaw in the system: Saidul Islam was in jail for two and a half years, but he recently got bail and was released.
Starting on November 25, the International Day for the Elimination of Violence against Women, people around the world are displaying the colour orange to symbolise hope for a future free from violence against women. The campaign is titled "Orange YOUR Neighbourhood" and is part of the UN Secretary-General's campaign UNiTE to End Violence against Women. The theme will be active throughout related events during the 16 Days of Activism against Gender-based violence, which will run between November 25 and December 10, Human Rights Day.
Women's rights groups and organisations in the country are working to raise awareness on this important issue. Manusher Jonno Foundation observed the day with 21 partner NGO's across Bangladesh. Rallies, workshops and dramas were held in Gopalgonj, Patuakhali, Kurigram, Borguna, among other districts, keeping in mind the Orange theme. Naripokkho, a leading women's rights NGO, organised a play on child marriage and its repercussions at Chhayanaut on November 24. BRAC is organising rallies and human chains in all 64 districts.
A UN Women report found that among all women killed in 2012 around the world, nearly half died at the hands of a partner or family member. Unfortunately, most crimes go unpunished and perpetrators walk free. The challenge is to break down those walls and ensure a safe space for women, which is their basic human right.
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