Takes on your hand shakes
Some people overlook the hidden meanings behind handshakes because it's an impulsive greeting. But there are many things one can infer from a simple handshake. Here are some of them:
The bones break shake
When I approach you one hand extended with a kind smile etched on my lips, I bear absolutely zero intention of fist wrestling. Now bone breakers must find it difficult to comprehend the difference since they crush innocent hands on a daily basis. It's like the relationship between an arthritis patient and their stress ball. So be prepared to have the life squeezed out of your palms as you encounter them. This handshake definitely comes from the cocky kid in class who turns out to be some big shot CEO in the future. The message of squeezing your hand until you quaver is clearly designed to daunt you. Now you don't have to give in to the intimidation game, but try not to make a competition out of who's got the tightergrip. Even if you win, a fractured thumb is no trophy.
Failing to keep you awake shake
This handshake, or lack thereof, could easily get you bored mid shake. Zero energy, zero shake, no squeeze, not even a pinch. This handshake comes from the type of person whose goldfish just died, or they just went from the youngest child to the middle child and they're just done with life. I wouldn't know the sensation of gripping a dead fish but thank you for the closest comparison. Seriously people, get a grip.
Different take shake
Now this is just awkward. I extended an open hand from one end, you respond to that with a closed fist and there is absolutely zero coordination here. I'll be feeling ancient and not hip enough, and giggle uncomfortably. You'll be rapidly opening your fist pretending you meant for a shake all along, feeling juvenile and stupid. It's just a mess.
The receiver's forsake shake
Um, rude. I am extending my hand forward, planning on giving you five whole seconds of my time, gifting you with the politeness and nimbleness that comes with my touch. But you have the audacity to do a quick grasp and brush off which feels like my hand was just shoved aside? I came here for a full on three shake commitment and you just give me an apathetic touch-and-leave. I'll be trying to reminisce the sensation of your hand as I stand alone feeling small, wondering where I had gone wrong.
Your own take on the shake
At some point of your life, you had that special super cool handshake with your best friend, or your sibling which spoke volumes about the indestructible bond that you share. You know, the one where you would twist your hands in weird angles rather than a straight normal approach, the one that consisted of a fist bump and a side bump along with the shakes and some other random body part bump. Good times.
Handshakes are important for the image you portray. So shake it till you make it.
Samin Sabah Islam is on a quest to find the perfect diet while simultaneously drooling over pizza. Throw her some tips at [email protected]
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