Being a Noakhailla, it is fun and/or stressful when the mention of our hometown causes mass hysteria in a room full of people. I'd like to clear the air once and for all, and get real – bust some myths and perpetuate some semi-truths.
WHEN AT A DAWAT, WE LEAVE ONCE WE ARE DONE WITH THE FOOD:
Since human beings cannot photosynthesise, food is the only mode of nourishment available. If the food is free, even better. At any given dawat, the highlight is the food; socialising is a distant second. Therefore, there is no point in blaming us Noakhaillas for being authentic and give food the love and attention it deserves, and then leave the party once we're done. Also, we never tend to prolong our stay because the host would already have a lot on their plate, just like we had on ours.
IN A GROUP OF PEOPLE, WE LIKE TO INITIATE DRAMA:
Contrary to popular belief, we do not tend to cause problems between people by spinning their words to give them a completely different meaning. On the other hand, it is not only a person from Noakhali who tends to be twisted; plenty of folks from other districts love drama. There are many assumptions made in the process of telling a story, and words having multiple meanings only complicate the plot.
WE HAVE AN UNDECIPHERABLE DIALECT:
Many a times, people of Noakhali are asked about their proficiency in the dialect of the region. The locals tend to talk fast in the dialect which can be very confusing. Also, one of the most frequent queries is to explain why water becomes honey when you're Noakhailla, demanding an explanation for why the 'p' in Bangla becomes 'h'. But if you really think about it, it's magic.
All said and done, whenever life gives you a Noakhailla, cherish them because we are awfully nice people.
Disclaimer: The information included in this article is to shed light on various confusions. For more information, please contact your Noakhailla friend.
Zarin Rezwana is a weird potato trying to be a French fry. Send help or send ketchup at firstname.lastname@example.org