Raising Son
A dog bites me on that part of my anatomy where the sun doesn't shine. It's all my fault for being 9 years old, for having my behind facing the dog, for my posterior being too close to the ground so as to be within easy reach of the dog and finally, for not being fast enough to out-run the chasing dog.
Thus, the canine is 'enticed' by the low hanging fruit and based on its 'natural' instincts, comes running and then rests its fangs deep into my rear.
Flawed reasoning of a true story? Not at all, considering the direction of blame in the case of a sexual harassment or assault. Besides, men are to be heard, and women are to be seen, at least when we're facing the silver screen. Sub-continental movies show the hero singing and following the not too happy heroine and eventually winning her (and her rich father) over after tormenting her (and the viewers) for three hours. Moral: 'pursue' the woman hard enough and she will eventually fall in love. It's all based on our conventional wisdom – when a girl says 'no', she really means 'yes'.
Our sexual predators are taking this film-sy message as a flimsy excuse to conveniently ignore the fact that there is a big difference between showing something on screen and promoting it. After all, what can three hours do to influence the mind while there is the long 21 other non-movie hours left of business as usual with the father calling the daughter a curse or the husband, in view of the son, likening the wife to an illustrious lady of the street (he may actually like the latter).
Does this mean chivalry is dead? Not at all. We open the door for the woman, then shut the door behind us before taking the 'no' for a 'yes' with no CCTV cameras in view (like having one really matters…). Oh wait, the mobile phone video camera is always handy in case we want to make a fast buck from blackmailing…
Ah, the influence of the movie. I'm sure then we see a surge in law school applicants after The Paper Chase, a stampede to join the Navy after Top Gun, or a plethora of swashbuckling after Bonnie and Clyde. Ok, the last one is a bad example, considering the deadly Ashulia bank robbery.
It's just the movie reel, not the movie real. We know that – we are just selectively and conveniently morons. The movie directors know this. Otherwise, the sexual harassment scenes would display at the bottom: "Inspector General's Warning: Such pursuits in real life are harmful for the criminal record and can even cause imprisonment."
And so, we welcome the Bangla New Year at Shuhrawardy Udyan – business as usual. Just like the Abhijit incident, the synchronized attacks on the women are deemed as mere 'student vs. student' engagements, off limits to law enforcement who later get flak from higher ups anyway for doing their jobs. Too bad the victims (can we call them so now please?) are not US citizens to warrant the FBI making another trip to the same area. Then again, we're still waiting to see their last trip report as we here continue on at our own sweet pace – taking five days to acknowledge that the April 14 incident happened at all.
There is hope though, just wait till 2055 when the April 14, 2015 sexual harassment perpetrators are caught and tried, if at all, considering that the nation is now trying the crimes of 1971.
But there are the Good Samaritans – those who came to the rescue instead of just gawking or flipping out their mobile phones to capture videos (could have served as evidence) and were rewarded with broken bones. Then there are the ones in the virtual world whose rewards are death threats.
Yet, we have the audacity to hope that we don't have to hope to cope the grope.
We have raised our daughters – it is time to raise our sons.
The writer is an engineer & CEO turned comedian (by choice), the host of NTV's The Naveed Mahbub Show and the founder of Naveed's Comedy Club.
E-mail: [email protected]
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