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Not so Sweet
may have already heard or read most of this week's contents, what
with SMS being the latest in-thing in mobile culture. While modesty
more than cowardice prevents me from repeating all that I receive
digitally, there are some that concern us nationally.
SMS 1: Last week a prisoner almost managed to get out of a district
jail by wearing a face cover that hid his nose and mouth. Asked
the sentry at the gate what was the matter, replied the detainee
with a degree of gambhirjo: 'Sars'. Fortunately for the hand of
the law, one intelligent policemen (Yea! They are not totally
extinct), noticed the gait of the prisoner and could identify
him just in time.
SMS 2: They say hot chillies are a good protection against SARS.
You should have just enough so as not to catch ulcer. That is
of course not the real reason why the price of chillies is going
up, making the situation even hotter.
SMS 3: Price of vegetables spiralling because of some Sirs.
SMS 4: Good to see that many of the major roads in municipal Dhaka
are gradually becoming pliable. This may not be all that a good
omen for BNP in terms of the polls.
The last AL government made hundreds of miles of roads all across
the country, especially in rural areas. They lost by thousands
SMS 5: Bangladesh Bank will try to save money, as that is their
major task. Nothing abnormal about that! One quick way to do that
is to retrench its large pool of staff. Good thinking! Threatened
B. Bank staff will get angry and kick director's car to send across
their message. Nothing wrong with that either! One of B. Bank's
directors is an ear, nose and throat specialist. Bankers are being
sacked and doctors are getting bank jobs. You don't need an ENT
specialist to tell you that that stinks.
SMS 6: Ripley's are interested in the ENT-BB story. Believe it
SMS 7: What more can the BCB do? They have recruited a proven
coach, who is eulogised by the local media. I only hope Dav is
mature enough not to take these into his head, and get down to
giving us the willpower to win. At the end of the day, the cricketers,
pampered unduly over the years, have to perform. Otherwise, in
spite of Whatmore, Bangladesh cricket may be little more than
SMS 8: Whatever happened to those 40 D-grade motor vessels? What
are their names? On which route do they ply? Are the passengers
aware that they are boarding a defective motor launch?
SMS 9: News of fatal traffic accidents is least read news item
in a newspaper.
SMS 10: Bepawroa bus and truck drivers should be chained to their
vehicles in the 'gate-lock' spirit, so that they cannot abscond
even after the vehicle involved in an accident is detained by
SMS 11: Street rallies in observance of certain days should be
abolished. They serve no purpose other than provide the meagre
number of participants with oversized T-shirts and silly paper
hats. Of course, their purpose of stopping traffic at peak hour
is well achieved.
SMS 12: Many more people have written letters to the Editor on
ZIA's Arabic sign and on Banya's mispronunciation than on hundreds
of innocent poor people dying unnecessarily at the hands of killer
launch owners each and every year.
SMS 13: Lucky for us. Government has no plans to appoint bankers
to medical colleges. SMS 14: Launch owner travels by road. Although
more expensive for him, it is much safer for him.
SMS 15: Launch owner advises business partner to travel by launch,
saying it was very relaxing; did not say for whom.
SMS 16: Arabic man landing at ZIA was furious when he found out
that he was in the wrong airport. He could read the sign.
SMS 17: A piece of advice: Delete all your messages because it
creates space for new ones. More importantly, someone else may