Spotlight

gal pals every woman need

God help the mister,
yeah God help the mister,
That comes between me
And my sisters
~ Spice Girls

Right before kindergarten, I had a friend called Jonathan. We'd hang out together all the time, playing with his GI-Joe and plastic swords. We were the best of buddies, embarking on many a colourful adventure together until we started school, at an age when boys and girls find each other 'icky'. The moment Jon realised that as a girl, I couldn't be allowed to associate with him in public, I lost a best friend.

This started off a pattern that would last throughout my high school years; I'd form intense bonds with someone, and we'd become 'best friends' until something happened to make one of us realise that the other didn't quite possess all of the 'must-have' qualities that card companies and rom-coms state that every friend should, and the friendship fizzled out.

My story isn't a unique one. Most of us at some point in our lives will have entertained unrealistic expectations of our friendships, which ultimately strain the relationship. We put one person on the uncomfortable 'best friend' hot seat and expect him/her to fulfill all the communication needs. While it's only natural to be closer to some friends than others, expecting one person to meet all the emotional needs is just setting oneself up for a huge disappointment. Think of Carrie Bradshaw's three BFF's. Each has a distinct and unique personality, and serves a different purpose. Just so, as we get older, we come to associate with different kinds of people, and develop unique bonds with them, which cannot be compared to any other relationship we may have.

Keeping that in mind, you can have different kinds of friends, from nodding acquaintances, but there are five gal pals no woman should have to do without.

The Straight Shooter
She might be a childhood friend who's seen you in your braces and unibrow, or she might be someone you've recently become close to, but if you're looking for an opinion and you want the plain unvarnished truth, this is the friend you turn to. She tells it like it is, no holds barred, because you share a level of trust and comfort where you know that any negative feedback is for your own good and not because she wants to put you down, and any positive feedback is from the [More]